Saturday, October 19, 2013

Introducing.... Me.

Hello. My name is Elissa, I am currenly 21 years old. I have a Dad, a Mum and two older brothers. My parents were missionaries before I was born. 6 months after I came into the world, we went to PNG so that my parents could continue their work there. We stayed there for 3 years. We came back to Aus, and have been living here in Brisbane since then, and have also been attending the same church.

I'm not a perfect christian girl. It is true that I attended Sunday school as a child and when I was old enough to go to youth group I attended there and I didn't want to leave ever ever ever...... But behind the corny church loving little girI, is a confused church loving girl. I have been hurt, and I have hurt the people that I love. I have made mistakes that would sound unbelievable to people who think they know me. I feel sick when I think of some of my mistakes. I feel wrong a lot, and I feel like common sence doesn't exist in me. I feel sorry for myself, but I understand that there are millions of people who have been through and continue to go through things much worse than I have. My pain seems so little in comparison, however that doesn't mean that my problems are worthless. 

God is my passion. I love him for many things, but mostly for John 3:16. It is amazing that he could ever love a sinner like me.
 I am now a Sunday school teacher, and instead of being a youth leader like I had planned, I am a girls brigade leader.
 I recognize that God's plans are better.

 I have a fianc'ee called Rob, whom I love very much. We met five years ago, and have been engaged for nearly two years. We will be married on the 3rd of May 2014. I love that he loves God, I love that he is interested in my interests. I love that he makes me laugh, I love that he puts my past failures away, that he is forgiving. I love it when he surprises me, I love his generosity. I love his kind words and his gentle heart. I love his affection. I love that he will love me until death do us part.

 I am a child care worker with dreams of becoming a child counselor. I have many other dreams too, and I plan to pray over them. 

I like Cuddly things, wombats, animals, Cookie monster, cookies, chocolate, children, dresses and high heal shoes, drawing, painting, relaxing, playing the piano, listening to a wide range of music, playing the Uke, and a whole heap of things.

I want to enjoy the little things in life, and I want to keep trying harder to be the woman that God designed me to be.
 

Next time you go to judge someone. Think about it. Think about God creating them in their mothers womb. God looks on each and every one of his creations in unconditional love.  Maybe it is time to consider why people might be the way they are. Should we maybe try and see the good things about them, not the negative?


Thursday, September 5, 2013

Personal disappointment

I am disappointed in myself
That I became this angry, selfish, insecure being.
That I lost friends, and I lost chances to tell them about the light that I know of.
I am disappointed in myself because I fail to change, even though I promised God that I would. 
I am disappointed that I spend my day to day life wanting to evangelise, but fail to do so. I am disappointed that I don't pursue my burning passions, because of fear and past failure.
I have let myself down, I have let the people down that need to hear of God's grace, and I feel like I have let God down.

The crazy thing is... I haven't really let God down. God knew that all of these things would happen... God knew my secrets before I did! I don't believe God can be let down. He knows what us humans are like. WE ARE SINNERS! Sinners that he loves, so much that He sent his one and only son ,Jesus, to die a brutal death on the cross and rise again so that we may live and not be guilty. Because of what he did, we are not meant to be guilty.
This doesn't mean that God doesn't get upset when we do wrong, I'm sure he does. My point is that if we accept Jesus into our heart, our guilt is gone, therefore, how can we possibly be letting God down?

But why do I still feel disappointed in myself, and guilty because of my sins? It is simply because the world is full of guilty people. Guilt is built into us, even though Jesus saved us from it. Just like sin is built into us, even though Jesus saved us from it. I might be disappointed in myself for a number of reasons, but I do want to change, therefore I will. God will love me no matter what.. He knows that I have things to work on, and he knows who I will become. I do need to work harder, and it is good to recognise my failures so that I can work on them. I will still fail and fail, over and over, to live a completely God centred life, however I can be 100% confident that God won't abandon me.







Friday, August 16, 2013

Trust

On the morning of September 11th, 2001, in America...... , it was night in Australia. It wasn't until the next morning (September 12th), that I heard the horrific news of the terrorist attacks in new york. I was getting ready for my school day, when my Dad rang up from work, and told us to turn the tv on. Pretty much every channel had breaking news on the tragic event. I was only 9 years old, and I knew there was such thing as bullying, I knew that there were poor people, suffering people, I knew that there were natural disasters...... But it wasn't till I heard of the terrorist attacks that I fully realised that there  are really cruel people in this world. I had never heard of such a cruel act. I also didn't understand why people from over seas would want to kill the innocent. I freaked out. I would duck every time a plane flew over. I didn't really know how to cope with tragedy. In a strange way it interested me though... I wanted to know more. 

Since then, many more disasters have occurred. I was too young to be hearing of such things, but I didn't have a choice. It is because of disasters that I have lived a lot of my life in fear of loss. I feared loosing loved ones to tragic events, and in all honesty, I still do fear this somewhat now. 
Fear is a good thing in a way I suppose, but we can't let it run our lives. I believe it all comes down to faith and trust that Jesus knows what he is doing. Unfortunately that is easier said than done. I have understood for a long time that we are to trust jesus, however trusting that he can and trusting that he will, are two different things. I know Jesus CAN help me out with my problems... But will he? If there is a lot of suffering going on, why should I believe that Jesus will keep me safe? So yeah, I guess I have a trust issue. I'm too scared to trust. 

The only thing to do is pray, and let Jesus be the centre of your life, especially in hard times. He knows what he is doing, and he will do with our life's, what he KNOWS is best, even when we can't see any good. 


Monday, July 29, 2013

Abortion

a·bor·tion

[uh-bawr-shuhn]
noun
1.
Also called voluntary abortion. the removal of an embryo or fetus from the uterus in order to end a pregnancy.
2.
any of various surgical methods for terminating a pregnancy, especially during the first six months.
3.
Also called spontaneous abortion. miscarriage (  def 1 ) .
4.
an immature and nonviable fetus.
5.
abortus (  def 2b )
- Dictionary.com
   
The topic of abortion isn't easy, but I'm sure you would agree that it has to be talked about, no matter how complicated, and no matter if you are  Pro- life, or Pro- abortion. The reason it is a complicated topic, is because it messes with emotions. We all have opinions, which is why the topic gets heated. I have been in many conversations about abortion, mainly conversations with people who believe abortion is wrong (I share this same view). I have walked past petitioners who have pretty much begged me to sign their petition to allow abortion in Queensland... my answer is "No". I refuse to believe that abortion is ok, I know that I will always have a hate for it, I will never sign a petition of that sort
 
Firstly, before I argue abortion, I understand that there are many reasons why women have abortions. Here are some:
-Maybe a young teenage girl has had intercourse with a guy, and she finds herself pregnant. She doesn't want anyone finding out, or maybe she doesn't have the money to take care of the baby. She might be scared.
-Maybe an older woman becomes pregnant (in her 40's or 50's) and thought she would never be pregnant at her age, she doesn't want to raise another child.  It's too scary. 
-Maybe a woman falls pregnant (either expecting to or not expecting to), and finds out that the baby will be disabled, or have complications. The idea of bringing her child into the world, is too painful. The baby could have Down Syndrome or Cerebral Palsy, and she doesn't want that child to have a hard life. Maybe she doesn't believe that she can take care of the baby.
- Maybe a woman has been raped and falls pregnant, and she can't bare the thought of having a baby for that reason. She might not be ready to have this baby. The woman also might not want people to know that she was raped.

I'm sure there are many more reasons why women might be considering an abortion or have had an abortion, and even though I feel sorry for these women, I will still argue that abortion is wrong.
The main reason for abortion is fear. Fear of having this baby. I almost completely understand this (I say almost, because I haven't had to consider aborting a child). It must be very hard, but I am going to point out that our fear can be quite selfish. 
That teenage girl who became pregnant, and doesn't want her baby is selfish... she should have thought about the possibility of pregnancy before she had unsafe sex. It is selfish that she wants to kill her baby, because she is scared. We shouldn't let fear stop us from bringing life into this world.
The older woman who has become pregnant is selfish because she is scared for similar reasons.
The woman who has been raped and falls pregnant is selfish. She may be hurting really bad, but she is also letting fear get the better of her.
The reason why I am saying that these women are selfish, is because there is always a solution. There is adoption, or fostering if need be. Or if you have to be the one to take care of this child, than so be it. It may be painful, but it doesn't mean you should not give your child a chance. There are going to be many painful times in life that you will have to get through, no matter how tough. As a firm believer that God is real and that he sent his son Jesus to this earth to live and die for us so that we may live eternally (Read about this in John 3:16), I have trust in him. I have been through a lot of pain, there have been times where I didn't think that I could get through that pain, but when I end up trusting that God knows what he is doing, I find myself less scared. I pray, and I get through it.
What you need to ask yourself is:
"How do I know that my baby is going to have a hard life?"
"What is my right to kill this child?"
 "Am I just too scared to face the facts that this baby was meant to be, even though it will cause me pain?" 
"Am I arguing that abortion is ok, because I haven't properly looked at the other side of the argument?"
Jee I know I sound harsh, but I so desperately want abortion to stop, which might mean that I have to be harsh to get through to you.  

Again I will add my christian view. God created you, and brought you onto this earth because He loves every one of his children, even though he knows that his children will sin against him. He thought about you before the world began.
Then... Your mother kindly carried you in her womb for 9 months. She made a pretty big sacrifice. She most likely had to deal with morning sickness, crazy moods, and crazy cravings. Her body physically changed, which would probably have felt strange. She painfully gave birth to you.
 You may have been given up for adoption, 
you may have been given up as a foster child, 
she may have brought you up,
 she may have died during pregnancy, and you were brought up by somebody else,
you may have had complications..... 
BUT YOU ARE ALIVE! God wanted you to be alive, and he wants your child to be alive. 
 Mother Teresa
“It is a poverty to decide that a child must die so that you may live as you wish.”
Mother Teresa


Psalm 139 (New International Version)


Psalm 139

New International Version (NIV)
You have searched me, Lord,
    and you know me.
You know when I sit and when I rise;
    you perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying down;
    you are familiar with all my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue
    you, Lord, know it completely.
You hem me in behind and before,
    and you lay your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.
Where can I go from your Spirit?
    Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
    if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
    if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me,
    your right hand will hold me fast.
11 If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me
    and the light become night around me,”
12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;
    the night will shine like the day,
    for darkness is as light to you.
13 For you created my inmost being;
    you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
    your works are wonderful,
    I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you
    when I was made in the secret place,
    when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
16 Your eyes saw my unformed body;
    all the days ordained for me were written in your book
    before one of them came to be.
17 How precious to me are your thoughts,[a] God!
    How vast is the sum of them!
18 Were I to count them,
    they would outnumber the grains of sand—
    when I awake, I am still with you.
19 If only you, God, would slay the wicked!
    Away from me, you who are bloodthirsty!
20 They speak of you with evil intent;
    your adversaries misuse your name.
21 Do I not hate those who hate you, Lord,
    and abhor those who are in rebellion against you?
22 I have nothing but hatred for them;
    I count them my enemies.
23 Search me, God, and know my heart;
    test me and know my anxious thoughts.
24 See if there is any offensive way in me,
    and lead me in the way everlasting. 


If I haven't convinced you that abortion is wrong... if you have anger burning towards me, and towards pro-life arguers... than I suggest you click this link and watch the video. http://www.180movie.com/  It might not make sense at first, but please watch it the whole way through. 


 God bless you all 

  

Thursday, June 27, 2013

Baggage.

Sometimes life seems impossible.The pain becomes too much. Nothing is going your way, your plans are ruined. You feel down, you feel like there is nothing that can be done to change the situation. You feel so pressured by your thoughts that you just want to collapse into a heap, or crawl under the blankets and cry yourself to sleep.

 Yup it hurts.... This world is imperfect, it is full of disappointment, abandonment, fighting, anger, HATE... Sin. There are always going to be times where we are let down, but we can't forget that we also let people down, and most of all we let God down. It pains him to see us sin, because sin separates us from Him. He wants an intimate relationship with us... in fact He died for us, to make that relationship possible.... we go on Sinning.... and He goes on loving us. That's just it... He loves us, and is eternally devoted to us. We might be in pain, but God is willing to take on that pain, even though we can never repay Him for what He has done for us.
I struggle with letting Him take my burdens, but He wants to do just that.
God is so good!

Thursday, June 20, 2013

Life lessons.... What has God taught me from pain or sorrow or Depression.

My first response to this question is "wow. where do I start?". There are so many examples of pain, sorrow and depression in my life... and I think I am right in saying, it is the same for every person on earth. It is just that we have different experiences and different ways of handling experiences. I think God teaches me something in every painful situation that I have... so I'm just going to sum it up....

God has taught me:
To be patient
To be more sympathetic to others needs
That there is more to life than me
That there are always bigger problems
That he is in control
That I am fragile and I need Him to survive
That I am nothing without Him
That he suffers when I suffer
That there is no pain that I can't bare because of Him
That pain will not be a problem for me in eternity, because of the pain he went through on the cross.

and there is probably a lot more that he has taught me through pain and sorrow and depression!

There is always hope peeps.





Monday, June 17, 2013

Keep Calm and Sparkle!




OK so I was just browsing on Facebook, and one of my liked pages posted this picture on my feed. I got super duper excited because it reminded me of the "She is..."theme this year. >>>

I have been excited all year about the theme because it is exciting to learn about being lights for Jesus, shining his love all around. It is inspiring!
 I don't know about you, but I don't "Sparkle" enough. I don't shine. I hide. Even though Jesus has done things for me that I don't deserve, I am embarrassed to say his name to my colleges at work.
 If a friend were to rescue me from flood waters, I would forever be calling them my hero. I would want the world to know that this amazing person rescued me from death..... yet Jesus rescued me from death when he died that brutal death on the cross and I rarely say a thing about it.
I think that is the story for most of us. Even though God would use us more if we told people about our him, we still shy away. We should be shouting Jesus name from the rooftops, but we are afraid of being judged. That just goes to show how imperfect we are.
I think we need to pray more... pray that we won't be afraid, that we won't be ashamed, that we won't be embarrassed.... we need to let God take over our lives, and he needs to be in the center. We are not usable, If we don't allow him to use us.


Just sayin...

http://sheis.net.au/







Tuesday, April 23, 2013

I can only imagine.....

So the thing is God IS real.
God DID send His Son Jesus to live in this messed up world. Jesus was mocked, ridiculed, tempted, stripped naked, whipped brutally, a thorny crown was placed on his head, and after all this... at the brink of death already... he was forced to carry the cross up a hill... the instrument that he was to be crucified on. The people that were supposed to be for him, were against him. They hammered nails into his wrists and his feet and hoisted him up. The cross was more painful than we could imagine. For anyone who had to die this way, was absolute torture. To breathe, Jesus had to try to push himself up. His arms were dislocated, so this was pretty much impossible. It was a painful way to die for anyone, brilliant actually. Clever. Jesus however had it far worse than anyone... lets not forget that he was whipped and forced to carry his cross before he was nailed to the cross. He would have been exhausted. The cross was set aside for the worst criminals... Murderers. Jesus wasn't a criminal. Jesus was who he said he was. He could have bailed out at any time. It must have been hard when the soldiers asked him to come down to prove that he was God's son. He didn't come down, he stayed up there, because he loves us. He was the ultimate sacrifice. As Jesus died an earthquake hit, the temple curtains were torn in two, and darkness came over the land. It was only then that people realized that he actually was the king of kings.
But that's not all.... 3 days later he got up from his grave. He was alive!

Because of Jesus, I am alive. I have accepted his death, and all that he has done for me, and I have chosen to try my hardest to live for him. I still sin, and he still loves me... he is eternally devoted to me. When my time on earth is up, heaven will be my home.

I can only imagine what it will be like.

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Comparing problems

I hate it when people compare their pain to someone elses.

There are serious problems around the world, I get that there are starving children in Africa and other countries. There are homeless people all around the world, there are people who murder others or murder themselves. There are terrorists. Some places have guns more than other places. Some people are obese, some are anorexic, some are in between.

I could name every problem I can think of, and there would still be more.....



Ok, so I'll tell you what I mean by all this:
 I'm not allowed to call myself chubby. When I say that I have a muffin top, or my thighs are bigger than they should be, or my arms are starting to sag with fat like a tuck-shop ladies arms..... I get in trouble. I get in trouble by people who are heavier than me. One of my friends says "Darl, you've got nothing to worry about!". Well actually I do have plenty to worry about. I eat too much junk, and I snack a lot. I don't exercise enough, and I have a family history of heart problems. Just because I'm not as overweight as my friends, does not mean that I am not overweight at all. Obesity is a real problem in this world. I think it is healthy of me to want to lose weight. I should be encouraged, not criticized.

Second thing:
 I hate people comparing depression with starving children in Africa. For a world full of depression, there sure are a lot of people who don't really know what depression is. If you are one of the people who don't, then here is the definition from Dictionary.com:

de·pres·sion

[dih-presh-uhn] 
noun
1.
the act of depressing.
2.
the state of being depressed.
3.
a depressed or sunken place or part; an area lower than the surrounding surface.
4.
sadness; gloom; dejection.
5.
Psychiatry. a condition of general emotional dejection and withdrawal; sadness greater and more prolonged than that warranted by any objective reason. Compare clinical depression
  
 
You can't tell someone with clinical depression, to just get over it. It doesn't work.  It is common for a depressed person to not even want to get out of bed in the morning... that isn't laziness, it is illness. A big symptom of depression is anxiousness. I know someone who has bouts of serious depression, and he described how he felt as living in hell. He felt so anxious that he couldn't contain it. Depressed people, just like anyone with a mental illness, can't help their problem.

My point is that yes, some people ARE "better off" than other people, some problems may seem more problematic than others, and some ARE more problematic than others... but we all feel problems differently, just like we are passionate about different things. People hide things, and some people have problems that can't be hidden because they are a different sort of problem, does that make it worse?
 
Think before you speak, before you compare. 




 
 
 
 

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Change

It is time for a change. I haven't written in my old blog for a long time. So I've created this one.
This blog will be mostly the same, but it will be focused on change. This is my place to vent.
Let me introduce myself:
Name: Elissa
Birth date:  23/06/92
Relationship Status: Engaged to Rob Collett
Religion: I don't have a religion. Christianity isn't a religion, it is a relationship. I believe in the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. He is my best friend and my Savior. 
Interests-
Favorite Bands/artists: Relient.K, Hillsong, Bethany Dillon, Kari Jobe, Brooke Fraser, Superchic, Paul Colman, Coldplay, Temper trap, Angus and Julia Stone, Adele.
Books/Authors: The Bible, Lori Wick (Author), The Purpose Driven Life, 90 Minutes in Heaven, Sister Chicks (Series of books).
Movies:  The Lion King (And anything Disney), Hugo, Pirates Of the Caribbean, Narnia, Le Mis,... (These are just some)
TV Shows: Home and Away,  F.R.I.E.N.D.S., Elementary, Bones, Mr and Mrs Murder, MKR, Australia's Got Talent, My Strange addiction, My strange obsession, RPA.  
Hobbies: Singing, Playing the Piano, Playing the Ukulele, Playing the Harmonica. Drawing. Beading
General: Leading the Cadets at Girls Brigade. Teaching Sunday school. Looking after Children, Wombats, Cookie Monster, Shopping.


So that is all I can think of right now. This is me.
Pretty average, but I have a lot more to say about my life.